Contest for Songs and Poems to mock Broar/Brear/Broaranna

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Erik
Posts: 308
Joined: Thu Apr 20, 2023 6:06 pm

Contest for Songs and Poems to mock Broar/Brear/Broaranna

Post by Erik »

Well, I expected that, Broaranna has shown the same cowardice s/he did when called Broar and Brear. So I call on the good people of Boldhome to see who can come up with the best song or poem satirising the miserable wretch. I offer a prize of 25L to the composition I think best, to be presented to the winner at the start of Early Dark.

To kick you off, here is a very quick effort from myself. I am sure you can do much better - I am not really skilled in composition and I am realistic enough to admit the fact.

Broar Hofarson’s run away
So terrified he would not stay
In case with weapons he must play
But then came back as Brear
Brear Hofarson’s done the same
His poor excuses really lame
He lived up to the family name
Then came back as Broaranna
Broaranna is a coward too
She’s just like the other two
I wonder now just what she’ll do
What silly name she’ll choose next.

Have Fun!

Erik Stargazer
Lt. Warlord Mularik's Company
Assistant Runelord of Orlanth
Aide to City Lawspeaker
Colymar Tribe

(OOC: The poem should be read to the tune of "Bobby Shaftoe")
Broaranna
Posts: 45
Joined: Thu Apr 25, 2024 7:00 pm

Re: Contest for Songs and Poems to mock Broar/Brear/Broaranna

Post by Broaranna »

I wish to strongly object to this inference that I, Broar and Brear are all the same person.

This is ludicrous speculation and not worthy of recognition by anyone with half a brain, 'tis clearly just the rantings of a looney, a psychopathic looney to be precise.

Let's see if his courage is as big as his mouth and if he turns up for the duel.

Broaranna (Not Broar or Brear)
Ondurga
Posts: 123
Joined: Sun Apr 16, 2023 5:13 pm

Re: Contest for Songs and Poems to mock Broar/Brear/Broaranna

Post by Ondurga »

Erik wrote: Thu May 30, 2024 7:34 pmI call on the good people of Boldhome to see who can come up with the best song or poem satirising the miserable wretch.
I hope I might be able to claim that purse, sir, with this unworthy entry.

Yesterday
The Hofarsons seemed so far away
Now he’s a she and here to stay
Oh how I yearn for yesterday

Suddenly
She’s not half the man she used to be
Five o’clock shadow for all to see
And she still stands up to pee

And so today
Duels seem such an easy game to play
Now she needs a place to hide away
Her cowardice is here to stay

Oh how I yearn for yesterday
Ondurga Yorisdaughter of the Bachad
grumbold99
Posts: 176
Joined: Fri May 19, 2023 11:07 pm

Re: Contest for Songs and Poems to mock Broar/Brear/Broaranna

Post by grumbold99 »

All in the name of fun, here's my silly effort at adapting a classic

Broar's on the road again
Wearin' different clothes again
Broar's turnin' duels down
To keep his lifeblood clean

All his goods are sold again
His word's as good as gold again?
Says, if you see Erik now ask him
Please, to spare me

Erik and Broar they sparred along
Since the day down in the hollow
When the words went spouting on
And the feet were soon to follow

Broar's on the road again
Wearin' different clothes again
Broar's turnin' duels down
To keep his lifeblood clean

Sayin' his goodbyes again
A new disguise in his mind again
Says, if you see Erik now ask him
Please, to spare me

Shut the door, snuff the light
Broar won't be duelling tonight
You can wait 'til the dawn rolls in
You won't see that alias again
Grumbold Rahlefson of the Locaem

Scrawny tow-headed beanpole of a lad; usually complaining about the cold, the damp, the pollen or the heat.
Proprietor of Silks and Sapphires. Conspicuously buy your apparel here!
Lt Col of the Royal Foot Guard.
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